Today I become a daddy

It's 1:55am, Oct 12, 2010 and at some point in the next 20 hours, I will be a father.  I always feel like I used to be a dad at one point in having a much younger sister who always looked up to me.  Asking me to get her things, to have someone to play with, to babysit, to look after; all the great things a father gets to do.  When I grew up and she grew up, while I'll never lose the having someone that looks up to me, I did lose the coddling and babysitting aspects of "being dad".

I can't wait to go through all the difficult things that my dad I'm sure had to ponder when dealing with me.  I was a very quiet child... at one time, but that doesn't mean I held back from (unnecessarily) being an ass to people or doing stupid... STUPID things.  Things like climbing on jungle gym equipment in hardware store display areas, ripping books to shreds that weren't mine, breaking siblings leg (twice), talking out my ass to adults (nothing new there) and generally being embarrassing.  All events that had to be dealt with (among the many I'm sure I can't remember) and helped steer me to who I am today.  These inflection points will soon be left up to me to answer, me to shape, and me to discipline in the correct manner; all to help shape part of the next generation.  A generation that will inevitably have to handle all the problems that mine fails to solve (whatever those might be).

Today, that burden and gift shifts to me.. something I've wanted for so very long to feel.  And I couldn't be happier to have the responsibility.  Being one who always has something to say, it's very difficult for me to get any words out at all about how I feel; even just into my thoughts as I type.  Far beyond having someone to completely push my hell-bent hockey obsession onto, I'll have the little guy that started our own little family.  I couldn't be happier to be starting that family later today with him and my amazing wife.

I can't wait to meet Mason and help him through all the easy and difficult lessons in life the way my dad was there for me.  I may not have the multi-hour car-rides off to college as an option (sorry kid, your already forced to go to the home of the blue and the white) but that doesn't mean I can't come up with similar events in which to impart invaluable perspectives and knowledge.

And though I may be hell-bent on him playing hockey (and obviously dominating ;) ).  The most important thing will always be that he's happy in whatever he does and who ever he becomes.  Many of you that know me know I spent many years being unhappy with who I was (or had become rather).  I pray he is able to learn the lessons I did without the pain along the way, also knowing I'll have to let him experience some of the same failings I did in order for him to experience the same personal growth (probably what will be the hardest part of being a parent; letting your kid know failure).  While my parents always let me know what they did and did not approve of, it was always made very clear that the pen was in my hand to write my own story much as I must past to my son.

If you take nothing from this, Hug those you care about the most, for all these incredible experiences are just snap-shots in time.  Seconds after they occur they begin to fade but never let the fact that the moment has passed take away from the warmth it can bring you every day to think upon.

Love every day, grab your kids and hold them close, I know I will get to very soon...